(note - due to the sensitive and personal nature of this journey, I have decided to edit this post. Aug 29, 07 - kt)
The ayahuasca ceremony was very interesting. I was told right off that I was fortunate to be there that night because it was starting Sat eve. with an ubunda (s/p?) dance. ("O, the trance dance, Dale said to me yesterday.. thats really fun. He couldn't make it this weekend - He went to a trance wedding!!! Wow!) We drank 3 times. So, for the first we all 1st lined up along the steps down to the foyer where there was a table set up and you one by one would go get a little glass of the ayahuasca tea and drink it & the go back upstairs. All the men were on one side of the circle and women on the other. 2 of the leader/guides, one male and one female were directly opposite the musicians and they showed us the steps.. 3 different dances and we would follow them. Simple dances, 1 was 2 steps to the left, step, 2 to the right, step. another was turning to the left, 4 steps to the right, 2 steps, then 4 steps back to the left, 2 steps.That was fun. It wasn't strong, not a lot happened to me, I wasn't sick or anything.
To be honest I thought I was going to get off easy.. not only was I fairly experienced (or so I thought) in this sort of thing I thought I was very well-adjusted, not many issues to deal with etc in life. Wow, was I in for a surprise. 2nd trip down & they were setting up the space, we were going to go up & sit on our cushions. I went up & they were putting out the lined baskets everywhere & boxes of kleenex. This one was much stronger. One of the characteristics I had heard was that you often get sick. I did hear some people getting sick but vaguely because by then I started seeing the visuals and when that happens, nothing else really matters. (I was nauseous, & kind of had dry heaves at one poit, I guess because I didn't eat much for the 2 days before)
The visuals were out of this world. So intensely detailed and surprisingly some of the designs seemed more like they were computer generated than natural to me.I expected animals and nature stuff.. mine was like billowing clouds of optical illusion lines, so finely detailed & swirling out from some design in the center (like the Om symbol) which had the brightest white light in it.. and it kept changing & changing colors.. but mine were more neutral brown/green colors. Mi-San said heres were yellow & pink & she kept thinking how these were my colors, not hers.. and the brightest white light ever..
& I saw other things.. an ancient sacred text open before me in a language I didn't know, maybe Hebrew, maybe Sanskrit.. but I knew if I knew the language I could read it & flip pages & I realized that everything was there inside of me. Everything.. all of the Akashic records that I had heard of ..everything that ever was & ever will be, past, present, & future.. was all contained inside. I knew this & have said it before that everything is in each one of us.. everything everyone else has thought or ever will think.. but I have never had it so proven to me. That was one of the things that changed.. really knowing this. Even when you know it sometimes it doesn't really hit home, yk?
and I was in hell. Well, I had my legs dangling over there & ..well, I realized how harmful some relationships can be. How people who are hurting themselves are really hurting everyone else as well. I mean I knew this.. but again I didn't realize the extent of it. Those people hurt others a LOT! & I saw angels, Margaret was an angel - she was the same as always & yet gold & glittery.. and I realized that we are all angels! & I felt the pain of the world & wanted to filter it all & feel it all to help clear it away. I cried so much... kind of like that silent stuff with tears rolling down your cheeks & nose & I was glued to the floor like a weight.
k, lots more, running out of time though.. Ah, these limitations, lol
Time 3 was like a more gentle version of time #2.
The music was amazing!
Oh & the food after, the next morning was amazing.. a table, or actually tables lined together, set up with the most amazing foods.. big bowls & plates of cut up watermelon & canteloupe & avocados halved & a huge raw chocolate cake & a huge delicious raw pate & some cooked foods also.. bread, etc.. but so much raw food! It was such an amazing spread.
I have 1 more raw thought I want to leave you with.. off topic of ayahuasca now. It is that when you decide to go raw or eat healthy foods.. it seems to me that they just appear before you. If you decide to eat only the best foods.. the universe will make sure they are there for you. For example yesterday.. my friend calls int he afternoon & asks if I would like the best mango in the whole world & that he'll bring it right over. how wonderful is that? & then Elena & I went to Yonge St yesterday & visited Chocosol & Dale showed up with baskets of apples & pears freshly picked off the tree (from a 200 year + organic orchard) picked that morning! & I came home with a big bag of them.. How beautiful is that?!
amazing.. like the rest of this amazing world.
Ayahuasca has made me see more beauty & depth in everything..
It's deep.. Deep, Deep, DEEP!!!
~Love You!~ : )
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
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